Music At My Mother’s Funeral

My mother died from cancer less than 3 months ago. However, due to certain COVID protocols, we were only able to hold a proper wake and funeral 50 days after.

This waiting time allowed my brother and I to plan, coordinate and practice the music for my mom’s funeral. Choosing the music was done carefully knowing that thru the music, alot of the deep emotions we can’t verbalize can be expressed, released, and processed.

We owe my mom alot for the musical knowledge we now have. She raised us on her own and money was tight most of the times. Yet still somehow, she managed to send my brother and I to music lessons. My mom does not know how to to play any musical instruments nor sing at the level of amateurs and professionals, but she understood the importance of music. Even though we did not have the money for alot of things, there was always money for music lessons.

Not only was there money, but by mother made sacrifices to make sure we practice. Many times I have been excused from washing dishes, cooking dinner, and even cleaning the house just so I can practice. Not the best course of action for raising a daughter, but this is just the level at which my mom was willing to make sure that the environment for the skill can grow and blossom.

And so as a tribute to her life and love for music, I would like to share with you the hymns and songs we carefully chose for her funeral. In every song, it was our aim to bring praise to God for being the Creator and Giver of life.

The Funeral Program

The Water is Wide

We began the service with an instrumental prelude played by my brother and I. The Water Is Wide is a popular Scottish tune originally entitled “O Waly, Waly” and dates back all the way from 1600. Later on it was popularized Bob Dylan and Joan Baez but using “The Water Is Wide” lyrics.

The video that I have put together below showcases this wonderful arrangement by Brant Adams which can also be used for other wind and string instruments. However, I took the liberty to apply different lyrics for the occasion of my mother’s funeral. I used Brian Wren’s “Is This a Day of New Beginnings?” to be a bit more appropriate and relevant.

Where Peace Has Always Been

The instrumental prelude above is followed by a choral meditation based on Be Still My Soul. Most of the song is originally written by Michael John Trotta and it talks about God always giving hope and encouragement as we cope and survive from the bitter experiences we encounter in life. Many of the difficult and uncertain things that happen in our lives are always a part of a bigger plan that God has for us.

We were so privileged to have a group of singers to sing this beautiful song! Led by our friend Zernan Diaz, the group consisted of graduates from Adventist University of the Philippines who were also at one point members of choral groups when they were in college.

We Shall Walk Through the Valley in Peace

This hymn of comfort is based on Psalm 23:4 which reads  “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me” (ESV). This is one of the most well-known verses in the Bible and is commonly used during funerals or by those approaching death. The message is simply — Do not fear. God is with us, and His presence gives us strength and hope.

This arrangement by Moses Hogan is a memorable setting of a classic spiritual. It builds slowly to a rich climax and then returns to a quiet conclusion.

The Lord Is My Shepherd

As a tribute to their grandmother, my niece and nephew sang this beautiful arrangement written by Cindy Berry. This is another perspective on the Psalm 23 but from the point of view where God guides us even though the path we tread in life is scary, frightening and lonely.

Be Still My Soul

The lyrics of this hymn really speaks alot about calmly and peacefully accepting God’s plans and will for us, especially when it is painful. Through it all, God remains faithful. I especially love the second verse where it says — Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake. All now mysterious shall be bright at last! The final verse is full of hope and reassurance that God will reunite us with loved ones who died in faith.

Molly Ijames’ arrangement of this classic hymn really captivates the stillness of the soul in any trial or circumstance.

Abide With Me

My affinity for this hymn started at a young age. My grandparents loved to sing it as they welcome the Sabbath on Friday evenings. There were many occasions when I spent welcoming the Sabbath with my grandparents and to this day, I feel warmth and comfort whenever I hear, sing or play this hymn.

The basis of this hymn is the story of the two men walking on Emmaus road. Jesus joined them on this walk as they conversed and discussed about the prophetic implications of Christ’s death. Not knowing that it was Jesus that walked with them on that road, they just felt that their hearts burned within them as they listened to His explanation of the scriptures (Luke 24:32).

As the sun set, they invite Jesus by saying, “Abide with us: for it is toward the evening, and the day is far spent.”

As we experience dark nights in our lives, let us also invite God’s presence to abide with us.

Jesus Paid It All and O Sacred Head Now Wounded

For the final viewing towards the end of the funeral service, my brother and I played another Brant Adams medley arrangement of the familiar hymns — Jesus Paid It All and O Sacred Head Now Wounded.

These hymns reminded us that Jesus can truly relate to pain, death and suffering. He experienced it for Himself — but not for Himself. He died to save us and to show us that there is hope beyond death.

Other hymns that was sung throughout the week during the wake and the necrological service:

Blessed Assurance

Joy By and By

I Shall See the King

It Is Well With My Soul

We Have This Hope

Draw Me Nearer

He Lives